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And that is not just based on age and maturity. Personality is also a factor in appropriate risk-taking, Campbell says. Every family — every child — is different. And a parent’s comfort level with a particular risk can be the result of their own upbringing or experiences, he adds. So, letting go can be that much harder if you associate a particular risk (like allowing your teen to drive alone for the first time) with personal pain or stress (your history of car accidents). “That’s why therapy is such a great tool for parents,” Campbell says. “It helps them understand why they might react a certain way to one risk as opposed to another.” But, Campbell adds, even though a teenager’s job is to seek autonomy, and risk-taking is one way to establish that, they do expect parents to push back. “It helps develop their cognitive skills and reminds them who is the adult.” international dance shoes sale uk sale.
If you wonder how you’re supposed to let go — for instance, let your child into the risky territory of a prom after-party or an extreme sport — remember the alternative international dance shoes sale uk sale. “If you don’t allow teens to take any risks, they can become overly dependent on their parents or rebel even more by taking greater, even dangerous, risks,” Campbell says. Cameron Sullivan of Pleasanton lets go in stages. The Sullivans are swimmers. Cameron’s 10-year-old twin girls and 12-year-old boy have been swimming since they were in diapers. But, when her son, Sean, asked if he could swim the mile-and-a-quarter from Alcatraz to the shore of San Francisco, a controlled swim with safety boats, mom set rules..
“I said, ‘You can do it, but I’m coming with you,’” she recalls. “Maybe at 13 or 14, I’ll let him do it with a friend.” That said, she encourages her kids to conquer their fears and expose themselves to new experiences, like running for office and trying out for the school band. “If it’s something healthy and productive, go for it,” she says international dance shoes sale uk sale. Because the brain’s executive function (responsible for risk assessment) is still developing in adolescents, parents need to make sure that their teen’s energy is steered into constructive social behavior, like leading, serving and finding their voice, says Peter Benson, a Minneapolis-based human development expert and president of the Search Institute, a nonprofit think tank for adolescent thriving..
“As brains are developing and we’re learning to let go, we do have to let them take actions we may not be 100 percent comfortable with, but the job of parents during that time is to provide all of the mechanisms possible to ensure safety and success,” Benson says. Mary Heeney of Mountain View supports the somewhat risky career paths of her kids, Martin and Emily. Martin, 14, wants to be a professional soccer player international dance shoes sale uk sale. Emily is 16 and pursuing ballet. Body image issues are of particular concern there, Heeney says. As for soccer? One word: Heading..
But it’s hard to deny the children. Six years ago, the kids helped make their parents’ dream come true by sailing with them from the San Francisco Bay to New Zealand on a 42-foot monohull. They were at sea for three years, and the kids had some of the same responsibilities as their captain and first mate parents. They drove motorized dinghies. They stood watch for squalls international dance shoes sale uk sale. Many people, including relatives, told Heeney she was putting her children at risk out at sea. She felt otherwise..